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happy snippets 200! :D

Happy Hunger Games! :D :3!
The movie was more intimate than epic.
I love josh hutcherson aka peeta and I love katniss and prim is pretty...:D
Cato and Clove were scary. great portrayal.
:D
I love me Hunger Games. :D
Can't wait and super excited for Catching Fire. :D

My Chronicles of the Hunger Games muvee.

Yi and I met up for the Thursday screening.
I wanted her to see my latest crush so, we hang out for
a while in the vicinity of the "terminal".
I was so happy she finally saw him..:))

It was my first time watching a movie using
a ticket bought via the internet. So I was nervous about it
and the fact that tickets are sold out...
I only allowed myself to be excited and giddy about
watching the movie when the tickets were approved.

After watching the movie, I saw my other crush and
giddily point him out with yi...

I feel like I have accomplished a lot that day...:))

Anyway, I went to watch it again last Saturday with
the rest of the family.
While waiting for the movie, the twins especially sidney
are all hyped up because school's out...
She has this summer adrenaline aka the embarrassing adrenaline.
:)) I love my potato...i mean sidney...:))

When we were lining up, I asked the guys in front of me
if that was the line for the hunger games. One said yes, and the
other said, Good Luck! :D I love my fellow HG geeks.

There was also this guy, he looks like the stereotype of a bully,
but I am not saying he is. And he was wearing this black shirt
with the mocking jay on it. :D I can feel the kinship...:))

While at the movie house, I kept on checking on my father.
He usually sleeps through a movie and every time his constant
comment is all the plots in the world have already been told.
It's the same banana again and again. Not his exact words but
that's the gist.

Anyway, I can hear his comments and queries during the movie.
I am so proud of him cause he can follow the story...
and he was paying attention...I am so proud of the movie...:))
He even said to sidney: It was a beautiful movie, anak. :D

Ah...my hunger games...:D

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I've been peeved for awhile about somebody else's whining. Although, to some extent I understand the reasons behind that person's whining. But it was hard not to weigh the scales. Not everything is black and white and there's no such thing as perfectly right nor perfectly wrong.

But feelings are feelings. And they are the hardest things to control on planet earth.
At least to me. That thing is something came up and elaborating it here would not seem appropriate.
It probably is just nothing but I hate feeling it. I hate feeling like I am a useless incompetent leech.
I hate hate that. And I am really sensitive. So, I guess I have to learn how to brush off this kind of things that floats about.

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The thing about Coelho. Paulo Coelho. Is it makes me more lazy that I already am. The sole reason why I stopped reading him when I was in college. It was vital I stop reading Coelho or I may not pass my major.

Anyway, for some reason I came across his blog a couple of days ago. And here I am sitting in front of my office desk typing this post. Yes, I am lazy as eff again. But I attribute that for finishing one FS. Lazying about is what I do best after finishing one FS. Not because I think I deserve it but because I guess I feel drained, and need some extra lazying around time for the next FS.

Anyway hemingway, back to Mr. Coelho, I like reading him the problem is it encourages my nature. My nature of being lazy. Why? Because it questions my way of living. It encourages me to evaluate my life, if I am happy and what I really want to do with it. It makes me lazy because it makes me think "what's the point of this? of all of this?". Gee! Phew!

Props to Mr. Coelho for affecting me this way...:)) I mean not a lot of writers can make you change your mind or make you reevaluate things...:D

*more on this later...

kathang-isip 001

*Don't you think you are asking too much?
** I know. (whispers to self) I know I am asking too much.
*I can't ---I can't do this. Not anymore.
You taught me how to love, but how can I love when I no longer know
how to love myself?
** ---
* leaves
** be--before you go...Please do me one last favor...
*----
**Plea-Please believe that I loved you. I love you and I love you still...
* leaves....
* ---I loved you. I love you and I love you still....

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I semi-promised myself that I'd list the movies I'd watch (and books I'd read) this year.
But as usual. I fail myself. But this post is sort of trying to compensate for it. Will list
down the movies I've watched so far in reverse chronological order...or maybe not.
So here goes.

1. Dead poets society - most depressing and inspiring movie i've ever watched in my life.
2. One day - I've skipped some parts though...:P
3. Princess Diaries. - some people might kill me for liking Disney movies. But I am cheesy. And disney makes great sappy cheesy movies...:))
4. Mr. and Mrs. Smith - this was cute. Really cute. :D Love the witty banters. :D
5. Mona Lisa Smile - Love this one. Visually and Inspiring-wise.
6. Rumor has it - the movie where I realized Jennifer Aniston's nice legs, body, and hair. :)) Yup I am blind like that.
7. The Graduate - I've watched this because of No. 6 and it's a classic. I wanted to know what it was all about. But it was confusing, just confusing and sad and yes, confusing.

Now, enters a slur of movies I can't remember which weekend I'm on...so...
8. The woman in Black - not scary though, but could be psychologically disturbing if you'd entertain it..:))
9.The vow - watched the same day with no. 8. watched after no. 8. At the end, it reminds me of a Local movie that is not as good though. This is the movie where I have truly appreciated Rachel McAdams' beauty. She was just so cute in this movie. Cute and Pretty. Yes.
10. Sherlock Holmes 2 - this was good. But I like the first one better. :D
(8 to 9 are moviehouse watched movies - alone)

11. Journey 2: Mysterious Island - josh hutcherson - can't wait for HG. :D

I've also watched Leap Year - love the guy, and Letters to Juliet - loved Verona, earlier this year. I've probably watched some movies I can't remember...so I'd post it later...

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I've read somewhere, sometime in 9gag...something like this...
"I hope he's braver than me."

:))

Yes. Please. Be braver than me.

This thought is bugging me for a while...:))

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I really like to think I am a colorful person. I'd like to think that I'd be able to do all the adventures I want to do and be able to go to places I want to be. All that's in the way are time and money.
But what if it is me? What if it's me that's in the way?
I am scared.
Do you know that I am quite shy of using my dream camera in public.
I don't like the thought and feeling that people think I am a poser.
I don't feel like a professional photographer using my dream camera.
I honestly feel like a tool! Seriously.
But I really want to use it and enjoy using it.
Ah brave heart...I wish I have one.
:))

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I promised myself to work immediately today. And I was propelling in that direction. Until a thought hits me.

*I've been browsing yahoo! the thing is they always feature great places to be in and get lost in.
I always knew I want to travel far and wide and varied. But it hit me today, after last night career talk/path with my mother, that I won't be able to travel this places if I'd stay here. I ached with that realization. I want to travel. And I am passionate about it. I am really really passionate about it. I feel so bad, disappointed and entirely heart broken with just the thought of me not being able to travel.

I am badly depressed by the idea that I won't be able to travel. And I am scared of my future. Terribly, awfully scared. Scared. Just scared.
Gahd! I hate my negative thoughts sometimes.

* I am already 22 years old but sometimes I am shocked of how awfully naive I still am. I am naive but already badly broken. Just imagine how broken I am when I am already not naive. If I can still break at that point.

*My mom once said the phrase, "Hindi ka ba masasaktan pag nalaman mong may mas mahalaga pa sa'yo?" pertaining to ones boyfriend. I was shocked. Shocked with that thought. I blurted, "Why would you ever think that?!" and she said "Hindi mo pa kasi naeexperience." Ok fine. She has a point with the inexperienced part but really?! To expect from a person that he/she should treat/value you as the most important person in his/her world. I think that's pretty much asking/expecting too much. I mean, really?! I can't ask/expect that from a person. Boyfriend, friend, sister, mother or father. I can't. I just can't. My head can not process that. Just can't.

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Commuting is one of the many times/places I fall in to deep, ahm ok, just some random epiphanies.

I can't remember how I fell into these thoughts:

Some people write to be read, I am not part of that some people. I write because there is something inside that wants out and that's about it.
The thing is when the strings attached to writing surprises you along the way. :D Unexpected sweet surprises that makes you go "wow! i actually affect people. wow! this feels so good. wow! just wow!".

For one, when I was in my senior year in high school I submitted most of my poems in our HS official literary compilation entitled "canticle". Most of my poems got published, under a pseudonym because I don't feel like telling the world, "Hey! Look I can write!" and yes, I am a shy person.  Anyway hemingway, after that, those poems were later on just some water under the bridge. The truth is I lost my touch of writing poems like that. I'd like to think I've moved on to different things...hehehe.


So what's the point? The point is sometime in my early college life, my sister Sarah told me that she have a friend who memorizes my poems because she, the friend, likes it so much. That without knowing that the writer was Sarah's big sister, me. That felt oh so nice! Someone memorizing your poems without anyone asking them to. Gahd! She memorized them because she just wants to. Gahd! How elated and humbled that made me feel. It was so touching to know, that I can affect people like that. It felt like it meant so much more because I didn't expect that. I didn't have that in mind while writing or while submitting them for publication. It's like winning in lottery without gambling.

Another incident is later in my college life, my twin sisters and their friends became the people who manages our high school publication. They gave me a copy of the latest version of the "canticle". I lend it to my friend and former high school classmate Checho. He read the poems. I haven't had the chance to read most of them, the time I lend it to him. Anyway, he showed me his favorite poem. I read it. The poem was good but for some then unknown reasons some words in the last part didn't fall nicely, they didn't feel nice. As I was about to walk away, the right words resounded in my head. That's when I back tracked and told my friend I think I have a poem like that. I reread the poem and lo and behold me! It's mine! I got plagiarized! I was shocked! But my first reaction wasn't that of annoyance or outraged but of sincerest flattery. Because as they say "imitation is the greatest form of flattery". I hope I don't sound egoistic or stupid, but that was something. People getting out of there way to copy you!

Another thing about that incident was Checho's reaction to the poem. For a friend, a tasteful, highly critical friend that is, to appreciate my work and not even know that I did it, was awesome. My friends commend my works but they are my friends. Their reaction was probably 50% friend related comments...:)) anyway hemingway! it was still awesome! :D

Sometime during typing this post I realize...Gahd! are my only good works got stuck in high school?! Good thing I remember this one time, when I asked my friend Myla to read  a short story I wrote based on a picture. Her reaction was, "Who wrote this? Did you write it?" and I said, "yes". She said "You're good! I actually thought a guy wrote it a conyo guy to be more specific". Or something like that. :))

I love my friends! And I badly miss them...:S

*Sorry for the wrong grammar and glitches, this post is still subject for editing later. Thanks!

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The good thing about the peak season, yes dear fellow auditors, there is a good thing about the peak season. Anyway, the good thing about peak season is in realizing how much time you have on your plate when it is not peak season. For one, going home at around 8 p.m. when it is peak season is pretty damn early. You'd realize how many times have you complained during slack season that you haven't even ride on your universe-designated van at 6:30 p.m. How much you have complained that you'd arrived home at 9 p.m. Another, you'd feel so effingly tired at around 9 p.m. in the slack season, that you'd just sleep your night away instead of doing something more productive, creative, lasting, etc. But no. You sleep your lazy ass through the night.

Another good thing about the peak season is the great feeling, inspiration and motivation of the slack season. The "this too shall pass" and "I'll get to enjoy all the time on my plate when this is over" is such a great horizon from this point of view.

Lastly but not the least, you'd have money by the end of the season. Why? You tell me. You work your lazy ass off for hours on end and surely, you'll have overtime pay, underrated and shortchanged but still there's money when there is money. Another thing about the money is that you won't have time to spend them so they tend to pile up. Unless, all the money magically turn into food that is. hehehe...:))

That's all folks! :D

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* it is so nice to be woken up by the string quartet version of coldplay's yellow. it feels like the universe is waking you up and welcoming you to a nice new day...:D said alarm is courtesy of my little sister sarina.

* I get the great big brush off last wednesday. it sucks to know you mean nothing to someone...:)) cheesy emo mode! :))

* I don't know how to present this so, I'd just shoot my way through it...
"Nagtampo ka na" and "Ako na lang ang makikinig" are phrases, with the right kind of tone, that makes me assume things that are not supposed to be assumed. I don't want to make things complicated. More so, to make beautiful things complicated. But if there is something within those phrases, it is nice to know. Nice to know indeed. But when things are like this, let's stick to the status quo. (Gah! ang feelingera ko talaga! :P).

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What happens if you fall in love with a writer?

"Lots of things might happen. That’s the thing about writers. They’re unpredictable. They might bring you eggs in bed for breakfast, or they might all but ignore you for days. They might bring you eggs in bed at three in the morning. Or they might wake you up for sex at three in the morning. Or make love at four in the afternoon. They might not sleep at all. Or they might sleep right through the alarm and forget to get you up for work. Or call you home from work to kill a spider. Or refuse to speak to you after finding out you’ve never seen To Kill A Mockingbird. Or spend the last of the rent money on five kinds of soap. Or sell your textbooks for cash halfway through the semester. Or leave you love notes in your pockets. Or wash you pants with Post-It notes in the pockets so your laundry comes out covered in bits of wet paper. They might cry if the Post-It notes are unread all over your pants. It’s an unpredictable life.

But what happens if a writer falls in love with you?

This is a little more predictable. You will find your hemp necklace with the glass mushroom pendant around the neck of someone at a bus stop in a short story. Your favorite shoes will mysteriously disappear, and show up in a poem. The watch you always wear, the watch you own but never wear, the fact that you’ve never worn a watch: they suddenly belong to characters you’ve never known. And yet they’re you. They’re not you; they’re someone else entirely, but they toss their hair like you. They use the same colloquialisms as you. They scratch their nose when they lie like you. Sometimes they will be narrators; sometimes protagonists, sometimes villains. Sometimes they will be nobodies, an unimportant, static prop. This might amuse you at first. Or confuse you. You might be bewildered when books turn into mirrors. You might try to see yourself how your beloved writer sees you when you read a poem about someone who has your middle name or prose about someone who has never seen To Kill A Mockingbird. These poems and novels and short stories, they will scatter into the wind. You will wonder if you’re wandering through the pages of some story you’ve never even read. There’s no way to know. And no way to erase it. Even if you leave, a part of you will always be left behind. 

If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die." 

source:http://karenfelloutofbedagain.tumblr.com/post/14327141634/what-happens-if-you-fall-in-love-with-a-writer

THIS. 

P.S. I've read this article last January 20, 2012 and I am pretty positive I've intended to post it here...hehehe...:D

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­­­­It's almost ten in the morning. I haven't done any work yet. Haven’t gathered enough momentum to want to work. Anywho, I’ve decided to write on my slate planner and in the process read some quotes, encouraging words and what-not. It made me realize how I’ve temporarily neglect my appreciation for life. My advocacy to happiness. Although, I am not unhappy about working overtime, really I don’t mind working overtime I like finishing things. :D I miss going home by 5 p.m. When the sun hasn’t set yet. I still manage to watch movies and read some short books. Am I that greedy to want more? I haven’t even touch my dream camera since its battery died on me and I haven’t have the energy or determination to charge it. Anyway, Hemingway...have to go back to work.

*written 02.28.2012